Sunday, August 31, 2008

Cinematic Sunday Fifty-Two

The wife and I slept in a bit today, then she woke me around 11:30 with brunch plans that she'd made with Morris and his buddy S. I brushed my teeth, shaved and dressed in a hurry, but still had plenty of time before they arrived. Anna Faris, Heavenly Buttocks Be Thy Name... They'd apparently had a flat this morning on Morris' Jeep and had to get that taken care of before they could come into town. While we'd waited, we'd also invited the wife's friend The Lobbyist out for brunch as well, so we visited and waited for her to arrive, then I drove us to the little place downtown to eat.

Brunch came and went, our waitress seemed less than enthused to be dealing with us, but the little fruit bar and cinnamon buns made up for it.

The wife and The Lobbyist had made plans to go and see the new Anna Faris flick, The House Bunny, so we dropped Morris and S back at Morris' Jeep at our house, then booked ass across town to catch the 2:00 showing. The flick wasn't anything special, a lot of obvious humor, but I admit to laughing a few times, and Faris looks amazing in her little skimpy outfits, she must not have eaten anything at all during the course of filming. That said, I'm kind of ashamed to admit that this is the one summer film I've seen besides Iron Man.

We hit a Starbuck's on the way back to the house and then chilled out and watched some television and made fun of whatever was on E! for awhile until The Lobbyist headed to her house to spend some time with her mother.

I popped in a copy of Sugar Hill that I'd bought awhile back, to check out the quality of it, as it was a weird import disc with about half of the DVD notes in Chinese. It turned out to be a pretty decent copy, at least as good as what we'd seen run on TCM several months back, so that was a relief, I was expecting a lousy VHS bootlegged transfer; I was pleasantly surprised.

The wife crashed in some weird ass early evening nap around 6:30, so I decided to hit the interweb and get this junk written while I had the free time, since the Fox animation stuff is all re-runs anyway.

Here's what I turned up that looks interesting this time around:

First up we have a film called The Burrowers, a horror film directed by JT Petty that sounds like an interesting take on a Tremors-style threat in the Old West. A town is menaced by strange creatures that only attack the humans and animals, leaving all valuables behind. Check it out and forgive me that the only version I could find is promoting the website that hosts it over on YouTube, so try to ignore the whole 'watch movies etc.' arrow that pops up there for a few seconds.

Next up is Passengers, a film by Rodrigo Garcia that stars Anne Hathaway as a woman counseling the scant few survivors of a plane crash, who begin to disappear under mysterious circumstances as one of them exhibits strange, almost supernatural abilities.

I heard a mention of Last Of The Living over on Mail Order Zombie earlier this week, and I decided to track down the trailer. While the general zombie set-up seems pretty standard, the presentation of this New Zealand production really grabbed my attention, as I'm a total whore for a stylish take on an established genre or theme and some of this editing reminded me of Guy Ritchie's editing style. Give it a look.

I close this evening with a film I hadn't heard of until I received an e-mail from a company promoting it, encouraging me to check it out. The film is called The Boy In The Striped Pajamas, which is about the friendship that develops between a couple of young boys on opposite sides of the fence of a German POW camp. It's directed by Mark Herman and stars David Thewlis, who I believe I've described before as being 'Satanically Ugly', and I doubt a turn as a Nazi will do much to change my opinion. The film looks like a real tearjerker (Read: wholly depressing) in spite of how sweet the kids relationship may be, and arrives in early November in time to depress you for the Holidays. Cheers!

Be seeing you.

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Saturday, August 30, 2008

Now That's More Like It...

I went to bed last night shortly after 1:00, watched I Know Who Killed Me on the DVR and then slept a nice solid 6 hours straight. This was a wonderful change of pace from the previous night, which had me up and down all night and left me sleeping half my day away.

I Know Who Killed Me
was surprisingly entertaining, admittedly corny at turns, but color-washed like the American answer to the Giallo, I was kinda impressed. From High School Student To Stripper In 10 Minutes Lindsay Lohan manages to pull off the old Elisha Cuthbert starring in The Girl Next Door magic trick/switcheroo by playing a stripper who never actually disrobes, though she does spend a lot of time in some racy outfits. The film evoked the Giallo feel pretty well, from the gruesome murders, the sleazy strip club atmosphere, right down to the odd plot hiccups here and there that get completely glossed over, I'd actually recommend catching it on cable if you get the chance.

I woke up at 9:00 this morning and forced myself awake, just to try and get back on a normal schedule of sleeping. I fed the Yorkie who was already out of the bed and on the back of the chair in the breakfast area, waiting patiently for the wife to return. I checked e-mail and then ran by the post office to drop something in the mail before grabbing a burger for lunch.

Oh, and in a brief digression, fuck McDonald's for having the audacity to tell me they're not serving lunch yet when their drive time is so fucking slow I could've had a burger in my hand by the time I crept around the corner, had they let me order it. I ended up driving off and going by a different one across town, the drive killing the 10 minutes they were unable to ignore. Fuck that clown and fuck me for eating there.

I came back to the house and ate while watching a movie called Dead And Gone to review for the folks over at Pop Syndicate. The flick was okay, nothing too special about a guy who takes his comatose wife to a remote cabin to possibly do away with her and collect on her estate, only to have his mental health begin to slip because of the local ghosts. It was a so-so flick, maybe worth a rental, but nothing I'm going to be watching again.

I ran the Mother In Law's medication over to her, trading voicemails with the wife while I did so, as we kept missing each other's calls. I finally got hold of her when I got back from the MIL's house, found out that they were on the road to Brownwood, where they would pick up the car and then head for home.

I popped in the iPod and worked for about an hour and a half, getting a pretty decent amount of work done after the nothing of yesterday, which made me very happy. I listened to the newest Cinema Diabolica while I worked, as well as Outside The Cinema, another show I've recently added to the rotation.

I spoke to the wife again, found out that they'd stopped for a late lunch, so I figured I had some time to kill. I headed to the office and wrote three reviews and submitted them to their various homes, listened to the latest Reel Horror Podcast while I did worked on the writing.

Between the writing and typical dicking around on the web I wasted a good deal of time, and when I finally poked my head out it was after 7:00 PM, so I called the wife to see where they were and found out that they were already in town, so that was a relief to now they'd made it back safe. They'd gone to Morris' Mom's place to drop off the car and were about to head my way.

They arrived shortly thereafter and the Yorkie was ecstatic, back to her perky self, which is cool, and we visited a bit before I excused myself to go and pick up a sandwich for supper, as they'd eaten late enough to nix the idea of going to eat or anything like that.

Morris split and the wife and I watched The Soup off the old TiVo and caught up on the past 24 hours. We called it something of an early night and I headed back to the office to get this junk written.

Be seeing you.

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Friday, August 29, 2008

Inadvertantly Starting The Weekend Early

You may recall (if you're one of the three people who read this regularly and not just some random Google hit) that I went to see the Allergist earlier in the week. That visit would very quickly ruin my night last night as I took the recommended dosages of the two nasal sprays they'd given me and then shortly after headed to bed. I was driven from sleep by a distressingly familiar sensation as my sinuses completely drained into my stomach and left me feeling on the verge of vomiting for the rest of the night. This was the case the last time I took these folks advice and used a prescribed nasal spray, which I eventually had to forego because I like to at least have a chance of sleeping at night. I was up every hour on the hour basically trying not to vomit, taking anything in the house that might settle my stomach, pretty much all to no avail.

Since I slept so poorly last night, I turned off the alarm when it went off at 9:00, told the wife the miserable situation and then told her I was going to try to sleep another hour or so. She was going to drop the dog off at the groomer and then pick up a small breakfast item for us, so I headed back to bed and left her to her errands.

I woke up again at 1:00 in the afternoon.

Fuck me, I hate sleeping a day away and wasting all of my time that way. The wife had to be at the airport to fly to Dallas around 2:00, so I got up and got dressed, ate my cold breakfast and then we headed out to the Mother In Law's house to drop off her medicine for the day. She was in a foul mood and still in bed, so we left there earlier than anticipated and I deposited the wife at the airport a little early.

I called Macguffin on a whim, since I was already halfway to Odessa just to see if he was up for a visit. I drove over there and spent the afternoon visiting with him and watching everyone wonder who the hell Sarah Palin was. We picked up a small lunch and then wacthed some more tube before I got the call from the groomer and decided I should head back.

I ran by our house to pick up a check for the groomer and then drove back across town to get the Yorkie. Had I known I'd be in Odessa I would have taken it with me, but hindsight is always like that, isn't it?

The dog and I headed home, I fed her an early supper and then goofed around online for a bit before settling in for a movie.

Debbleman, Debbleman Calling, Debbleman, Running In My Head! Yeah!By this time I'd already decided that I was just going to consider today a part of the weekend and try to get work done tomorrow instead of feeling bad about basically taking the day off today.

I watched Devilman, courtesy of those rental throttling pricks at Netfux. It was a live action version of the anime of the same name, which I barely remember (in spite of owning it, so I suppose I could easily fix that if I wanted to), which I popped in and crossed my fingers over, hoping for the best.

The movie was a baffling 2 hours long (!) but started out promisingly enough. It quickly began adding peripheral characters that don't bring anything interesting to the story, and eventually devolved near the end into what is essentially a video game animation sequence for the final battle. I went from a relatively high rating of this film to a middle of the road one in about 30 minutes.


I headed to the web to write this junk and try to get some sleep.

Be seeing you.

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Thursday, August 28, 2008

Talking To Those People Must've Been Exhausting

I have no other explanation why I'm so sleepy right now.

I'm now fighting off sleep by chatting with Andy from over at Destroy The Brain while I listen to the latest from the Subculture Collective; multi-tasking as I type this.

Oh, and here's a new Hank III video that hit the web earlier this week, I'd been meaning to post it. There's prolly some cursing in there, so don't press play if you're in the waiting room of the local Catholic Charities office, because he also says that the Devil's his friend a lot in the song, in addition to the fuck word.

The wife and I both got up early, she headed to the office to get on a conference call before another meeting she had at lunch, so I headed straight into the kitchen and popped in the iPod to get some work done, as I knew the wife also had some function scheduled for our house later today.

I got a nice chunk of work started while listening to the newest Night Of The Living Podcast. The wife came by on her way out and told me her planned schedule, which didn't include a visit to the liquor store that she'd been talking about yesterday when we discussed this whole party idea. She said that one of the people coming to set up for the party was going to bring wine, along with a fruit and cheese platter, plus she was too busy with a meeting and then an errand to get by the liquor store before 4:00 this afternoon.

I found this absolutely ridiculous, and proceeded to jump on her a little about it, because I think it's something of a dick move to agree to host a party and then have water and two varieties of soda to offer folks. Every party we've gone to hosted by other people in the same organization has been well-stocked and a lot of fun, so I figured we should at least try to return the favor. I ended up agreeing to make the liquor run to save her the time and immediately feeling bad because I'd kinda jumped on her.

I just feel like she commits to some of this stuff without any real concept of the prep time required, or feeling that she can just half-ass it through, which bugs me. I don't necessarily want to go to a huge trouble to do this stuff, but I don't want people to be poking around the fridge desperately wondering if we have anything else to drink either. I want the set-up to be clear and easily accessible to them.

Anyway, I worked until shortly after 12:00, then dressed, went and grabbed a coffee and hit the liquor store for provisions. I picked up a little lunch and headed home. I unloaded and put everything away and was in the process of eating when the wife got back (in plenty of time to have gone to the liquor store, I'm not bitching, just something I noticed), so she went to the web for a bit and then we both picked up the house and got things ready for the delivery of the snacks and stuff, scheduled to arrive at 3:00, an hour before the party.

Danny arrived and we set everything up, he actually brought most all of his own supplies and dishes, which was cool, so set-up was easy. The party was in honor of a departing secretary/assistant, and we ended up having about 20 or so total people show up, though some came and went pretty quickly, and we finally got everything settled down for the night about an hour and change later than we'd expected.

The wife picked up some supper and we chilled on the couch with the exhausted Yorkie, who was worn out from all the people in her house. We watched a TiVo suggested episode of Friday The 13th: The Series, and then the wife headed to bed early, as she'd received word that she is going to fly to Dallas tomorrow to do her friend Morris a favor by helping him to pick up a car and drive it back from Brownwood.

I'm still tired, so I'm out kids.

Be seeing you.

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Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Excuse Me, Is The Smelly Fellow Part Of Your Staff?

I have absolutely no interest in writing this junk this evening; I blame the lack of coffee intake today for my lack of enthusiasm. Let's plow ahead and see if I can ruin your interest in this as well, shall we?

I got up early again, as I'm desperately trying to get into more of a human sleeping schedule instead of that of a fucking possum. For several days there, I kept staying up later and later, rising later and later to the point that it was getting ridiculous. I checked e-mail and noticed a text from my friend B asking if I was up for lunch. I knew the wife had a couple of meetings and would be busy, so I figured what the hell and called her back to make plans. We agreed on a hamburger joint in the mall and I went to shower and get ready.

I met her at noon, the place surprisingly empty of high school kids, and we ate and visited about her daughter and step-daughter for a bit. I eventually excused myself, as I'd decided to poke around at the local books, music and video outlet before I went to the Allergist at 2:00.

I found nothing of interest book, music or video-wise, but I did run across the same homeless looking kid who has evidently taken up residence in one of the chairs near the mystery and horror sections of the book department. Please Leave The Store, You Stinky Fellow... He sat behind me, the back of his chair towards me, with nothing in his hands except for a cup of coffee, chuckling quietly to himself, which I found really unnerving. I at first thought he had in headphones, or was reading, but no, he had no visible stimulus save for his freebie cup of coffee. He snickered and chuckled to himself on and off the whole time I was skimming the section behind him, and was still doing it when I left. This may answer my questions as to why he's allowed to live in one of their chairs; perhaps the staff is too freaked out by him to kick him out, even though he has a near-visible odor that greets you at ten paces.

I did the Allergist thing next, and they again seemed really freaked out by the final results of the x-ray they had me get the last time I was in there, because they were so inconclusive. You might remember that time, when they thought I had somehow developed TUBERCULOSIS, which of course ended up being total bullshit, but better safe than sorry, right? They seemed to expect me to be coughing up blood or something this time around, which isn't the case at all. I feel really good in fact, save for all the excess weight I'm still carrying around because I'm too lazy to work out each day. I was able to convince them to not give me a breathing treatment because my lungs sounded great when they checked them out and I swear the guy almost seemed disappointed.

He forced some nose drops on me to supposedly clear up the drainage I wasn't even aware I was having and I was on my merry way.

I met the wife back home and we caught up on our days thus far, then I popped in the iPod and got some work done while she fielded some interweb correspondence before heading to another meeting. I listened to an older Mail Order Zombie, a new Dead Lantern Splattercast and this week's Destroy The Brain while I worked, finishing the first thing I'd been working on completely and starting in on the second one.

I watched one of the things I have to review for Pop Syndicate, a film called Puzzle, which reminded me a bit of Reservoir Dogs (and consequently City On Fire) due to the concept of a group of thieves who don't know one another being brought together to pull a job, but it ended up going off on its own plot line pretty well, I was kinda surprised, but there is a final twist that's a little silly.

The wife brought home dinner, so we ate and watched some television, a few TiVo'd South Park episodes before calling it something of an early night.

Be seeing you.

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Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Way To Market, HBO, Way To Market...

This may be a quick one, as not a lot happened today and all I really have to do is both praise and then bash HBO.

I got up at 9:00 this morning, fed the dog, checked e-mail and then dressed to go and run a few errands for the day. I hit Best Buy, because I had a Reward Zone Certificate to redeem and figured I'd use it to take some of the sting out of buying a Blu-Ray copy of The Nightmare Before Christmas and season four of Entourage. Vince And His Hangers On Are Back, Baby! Entourage was bundled with a free set of headphones from a company called Skullcandy, which was a nice bonus as I had been considering replacing the set that came with the iPod which are about four years old at this point. They've begun to fray at the connection point where they plug in and the little ear cushions have all but fell off from constant use.

I gassed up the car, spoke briefly to Robbb, who seemed busy today and then made my own plans for the afternoon. I picked up a sandwich for lunch, marveling at the goofy spastic teen boys in front of me in line, grinning and sniggering at each other and everything else in the room.

I don't remember any of the people I hung around with being that fucking happy in high school, I wondered what magical school in the land of make believe that these kids had come from to be so giddy with life.

I hit Starbuck's for a coffee and then headed home to eat. Robbb had called somewhere in there (presumably while I was watching those kids and pondering their idiot happiness), and he was curious about lunch. I called him back and invited him over, we visited for awhile, then the wife called from one of her errands, asking if I needed anything for lunch. I assured her that I was full of sandwich, but that she could bring Robbb something. She picked up food for the two of them, then came home.

They ate and visited a bit, then Robbb split to do some of his own running around, so I decided to try to get some work done. I tried out the Skullcandy earphones and holy shit do they work great, I've not been this impressed with a product in quite some time. A quick glance at their website gives me prices that make me cringe a bit, but I honestly think they might be worth it, the sound quality is amazing. Hot Asian Girls And Silly Zombie Action I got some work finished, wrapping up the penciled version of the first project I've been working on while I listened to an older episode of Cinema Diabolica that reviewed Bio Zombie, a flick I haven't watched in quite some time. It really made me want to break that one out and give it another look some time soon.

Best Buy was running a little promotion that scored you a free preview of HBO's new series True Blood, something that I'd mentioned before, so I was excited to pop in the freebie disc and check out the first episode a few weeks early. The wife was catching a late nap, so I joined her in the bedroom to pop this into the Blu-Ray player. I have to say that I dug the show, the idea of vampires 'coming out of the casket' as they call it and revealing themselves to the world when a synthetic blood is created was an interesting one, and the show's small town feel sets up interesting plot-threads. The one thing I fucking hated was the fact that the entire 58 minute episode has a greyscale HBO logo burnt into the entire picture, not a corner, mind you, not one that fades out after awhile, it stays onscreen the entire time and is fairly distracting when your main character spends a good amount of time standing around in a white t-shirt that draws the eye directly to it. I can't imagine the purpose of this, as they obviously want people to see their damned show and build interest for it, so why go so balls to the wall to insure we know that it's an HBO product? Am I going to suddenly forget how this thing found its way into my DVD player halfway through the show? Bah.

I put away some laundry afterward, then started making dinner. The wife and I ate and watched a few random things on the TiVo before calling it a night.

Be seeing you.

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Monday, August 25, 2008

Reality Television Should Always End With Gunshots Shortly Before The Credits

Oh, the crazy compromises of marriage!

The wife and I watched a marathon of the first season of Sunset Tan last night so that I could review it for Pop Syndicate. How Do You Make Half Naked People Boring And Irritating? I should mention at this point that I don't quite understand my wife's fascination with the utterly vacuous people that our pop culture produces, nor do I share it in any way, shape or form. My wife isn't a stupid person, so why in God's name she'd be interested in the lives of people like Paris Hilton or Pamela Anderson is just beyond me, but she manages to find their behavior amusing.

**A quick aside: Pam Anderson's new show is Gawd-fucking-awful. You heard it here first. The visual design makes my head hurt, they use so many color filters and video wankery that it verges on nauseating. It's like watching an annoyingly flashy and glitter-filled Myspace page load for 30 minutes.**

I don't get it at all; all that 'I'm a cute girl and can get away with this' type shit makes me have mild brain hemorrhages and want to kill everyone involved. I find that I have to limit my involvement with viewing shows like this, just to make certain we're able to stay married, because while I know she humors me about a lot of horror and indie film stuff, I feel as though I'm actually losing brain cells while watching reality television and can't commit to very much of it.

Yes, that's a glaring double standard, one which I feel that I can stand firmly behind, because I sat through one full season of The Bachelorette, I don't believe I could do that again and live.

As to Sunset Tan: I've never watched anything so terribly scripted in my life, none of these people would ever be allowed to behave anything like they do in a 'real' job situation, and they manage to create/gather the most toxic group of fuckers I've ever seen on one show. Painted Tuxes - Way To Class Things Up, Ladies... Everyone seems to alternately hate each other and then party together, all previous grudges forgotten as if they get memory wiped at the end of each show, and the two blondes that get so much press from the show, The Olly Girls? They're evidently as dumb as a fucking bag of hammers and can't even convincingly deliver what has to be scripted lines. All their inflections are wrong, it sounds like they're speaking English as a second language sometimes because the words come out so flat.


Got up at 9:00 this morning, made coffee, dicked with the web for a time, then the wife asked about going to an early lunch with her boy Brian. We met him, caught up a bit, he picked up lunch (a pleasant surprise) and then we headed back home.

The wife had plans with the Mother In Law for the afternoon, so she split and I got to work. I popped in the earbuds and listened to an older Dread Media while I worked. I took a break somewhere in there and wrote a review for Sunset Tan to get it out of my head and submitted it, then decided to get some more work done since the wife was still out running around with the MIL.

I listened to last week's Mail Order Zombie and got another good chunk of work done before the wife got home.

She arrived and spent some time online doing some rat-killing of her own, then we retired to the den and watched last night Venture Brothers season finale. I made us some supper and then we watched a little flick we'd TiVo'd awhile back called The Pixar Story, which gave behind the scenes history of the company up through the release of Cars. It was very interesting, and surprising to know how many times Disney has left those poor guys twisting in the wind only to come back and renew their connections later for more money.

We called it a night shortly thereafter and I headed to the office to knock this crap out for the four people still reading it. Because I'm all about the routine, baby.

There's new stuff to look at over at Big Suck Loser, so go and waste some more of your day, y'know you want to....

Be seeing you.

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Sunday, August 24, 2008

Cinematic Sunday Fifty-One

The wife is out of the house for most of the afternoon, so I find myself trying to get a lot of writing I've put off done just so that I will have it off my mind and be able to get some real work done tomorrow instead of feeling like I need to be writing.

We got up late, she started in on some laundry and I looked through the newspaper and checked e-mail. Hunt And Pecking My Way To The Grave We ordered up a pizza and ate whilst watching some TiVo'd re-runs of this or that. The wife had a baby shower in the mid-afternoon, and then a visit to the Mother In Law planned, so she went to do that and I hopped back online to try and knock this crap out and free up my evening for relaxing with the wife.

I should also note that the wife has actually come and gone again while I was tracking down links for various stuff in this post. She had to leave again to run back by the MIL's house, so I decided to take advantage of the free time and just completely finish this post instead of feeling like I'd have to come back to it later in the evening.

I wrote two reviews and submitted them to their respective review sites, then started poking around a bit for something interesting to show you, trailerwise.

I honestly have to say that each new week with this seems to become more frustrating, as there's less and less to pick from. I have never noticed how little there is coming out each week to pique the interest of a potential viewer, especially since I tend to look for stuff at least a little outside the mainstream.

First up we have Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer, which looks to be a little bit Evil Dead 2, 80's horror and a touch of Buffy mixed together with a ton of practical effects. The vibe I get from the trailer is definitely tongue in cheek, so if you don't like a little humor with your horror, you'll probably be put off immediately, but if you're not a total killjoy, give it a look. This comes to DVD in early October.

Next we have Beyond The Grave, which is a Brazilian film directed by Davi de Oliveira Pinheiro about a cop hunting a serial killer in a post-apocalyptic world filled with zombies, which has a release date of November of this year, which I'm sure refers to Brazil, so who knows when we'll see it here. Check it out, it looks interesting if you've ever been curious what would happen if Mad Max encountered zombies.

Finally we have a trailer for Blindness, a film by Fernando Meirelles which stars Julianne Moore and Mark Ruffalo (who I still have no use for) as a couple forced to cope as a strange sickness causes most of the population to go blind. Moore maintains her sight, and is forced to try and help those around her as things spiral out of control. The film opens in late September.

That's it for me kids, I'm calling it an early night.

Be seeing you.

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Saturday, August 23, 2008

So. Very. Late.

Back from dinner late and slightly buzzed, but the gathering was at a friend's house only a block and a half over, so we were able to walk it, which was nice.

I completely overslept this morning and wasted half the fucking day away sleeping. There, I said it.

I finally got up and the wife was hitting me up to go out to eat before I even had the sleep out of my eyes, so I checked e-mail for a split second and then we went to grab a late lunch.

We headed back home and chilled with some television, I noticed that Chiller has been running that old Freddy's Nightmares show, so we watched one of those, and nicely dated relic from my youth (Banana clips and leggings galore!), and then I popped in a movie.

The wife slept through Dark Honeymoon, an oddly paced little thriller about a guy whose wife goes on a killing spree while they're on their honeymoon, which is an obvious bummer. The whole film is told in flashback, so you obviously know who survived and a lot of what to expect from the film. I did take notes on that mother, so I may eventually write a review for it just for shits and giggles.

The wife got a package in the mail today from a company called Comics Now!, which contained a hardcover copy of the first Marvel Zombies collection. Brains Assemble! This was something she'd ordered last YEAR on November 1st, to be given to me as a birthday gift on November 17th, and since Amazon was sold out at the time, she went with one of the Amazon Sellers and this is what happened, almost a fucking year later it finally trickles into our mailbox, with a shipping label that laughingly has 'Priority' stamped on it.

I guess the people in question thought that the more descriptive company name of 'Comics Eventually' was a bit less catchy. Seriously, I would be fucking ashamed to even mail this thing out at this point, but I guess we should just be happy that it's here; the wife had completely forgotten about ordering it.

We went to a birthday dinner around the corner for a friend of the wife, which consisted of us and two other couples at a barbecue. I made nice with the guys outside by the grill, shooting the shit a bit in an effort to not just stand around and talk to the wives like I frequently do at these type of things, instead trying to stretch outside my comfort zone a little. The real problem at these type of parties is that I don't watch sports, I don't go golfing, I don't have any interest in talking about whatever oil company these men work for, so that limits the talking points dramatically at any of these type of social gatherings.

Plus I'd always rather talk to a group of women over a bunch of hairy-legged old boys any day of the week. I just socialize better with women, always have, always will. Dinner was good, I never really felt too out of place and our hosts had even been so kind as to pick up some Guinness because they knew that was what I drank, which I thought was a very sweet thing for them to do. We visited a bit after the meal, and we eventually found our way home at 11:00 PM, much later than the hour we'd eventually thought we might stay.

We also took special time to discuss the boob job one of the women in attendance had (once she and her husband had left, of course!), which I found amusing, because she'd recently had their second child and I had simply chalked her sweet cleavage up to that, but it's evidently man-made. Go technology? Whatever, I don't give a shit either way about fake boobs, I mean, they looked nice, but I'm not much of a breast guy.

And now here I am on the web, hunting and pecking about boob jobs.

Life is good.

Be seeing you.

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Friday, August 22, 2008

Wanna Hear About My Mysterious Cello?

Okay, this one is just more of the place holder for the blog than anything else, because no one ever reads it on the weekend anyway. Or that much at all, but fuckit, I've chosen my time waste for the rest of my days, and I'ma stick it out til the bitter end.

I was woken against my will this morning by the Yorkie barking at the lawn guys, who started in much earlier than anyone we're paying should (like 7:50 fucking AM!), so I forced myself back to sleep and ended up oversleeping until around 10:30 or so. I checked e-mail and then grabbed a shower and shave before picking up some lunch. I listened to the new CHUD Show while I ran my errands, then headed back home to eat.

I was scheduled to deliver the Mother In Law her medicine in the mid-afternoon, so I went by there at 2:30, visited with her for a few, then headed to the Hairdressers place for a much needed haircut.

Pardon My Haunted Cello...YawnI ended up watching a few things off the TiVo in the evening, an Asian horror flick called Cello that was okay, about a music teacher who is haunted after surviving an accident. I liked it fairly well, but anything you can guess the twist of within the first 30-45 minutes loses some points in my book.

I later found myself caught up in Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie just because it happened to be on cable. I've always liked those well enough, even though I never followed the show with any regularity.

The wife finally got back home this evening, dropped off around 10:30, so we caught up a bit and then I headed into the office to get this done and over with so that I can join her in bed.

Be seeing you.

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Thursday, August 21, 2008

Workday, Then One Film After Another

The wife had to leave this morning to go to an out of town seminar with a couple other gals for the woman's organization they belong to, so I got up early to see her off. The Yorkie was of course traumatized to see her leaving with an overnight bag. She spent the bulk of the morning on a pillow in the chair near the front window, presumably waiting for her to return.

I checked e-mail, drank a pot of coffee and got some work done while listening to a few things on the iPod. I blew through this week's Cinema Diabolica, an older (Cool) Shite, and most of this week's DVD Weekly Podcast, then decided to take a lunch break and run the Mother In Law's medications over to her.

I dropped that off first, then picked up some Thai for lunch.

Get Ready For A Lot Of Jokes About Balls...Back home, I watched Balls Of Fury since it was on cable as I sat down to eat, and it turned out to be pretty stupid, but made me laugh several times, so maybe it was just what I was in the mood for. I would honestly say that I found the film to be fairly amusing in spite of feeling like it was something that Jack Black had passed on somewhere during the development process, as the lead could easily be any character Black's ever played onscreen.

Please Light Your Film...I got a little more work done before my eyes started to bug me a bit, so I knocked off and decided to pop in one of the Blu-ray discs that'd been hanging around for a couple days since those rental throttling pricks at Netfux decided to pull their heads out. Aliens Vs. Predator: Requiem was an okay sci-fi action flick, better than the first one, but you still never really cared about any of the humans, and having this shit happen on earth basically fucks the Alien film series continuity right square in the ass. I would've actually liked it to be lit a bit better, as some of the fighting is a tad murky, which made it pretty Goddamned frustrating to try and follow the action.

I closed out my evening by watching one of the flicks I have to review for Pop Syndicate, a French film called Belphégor: Phantom Of The Louvre. It's about a mummy from the Egyptian display haunting the Louvre and possessing a woman who lives nearby. It was very so-so and featured pretty corny CGI that really takes you out of things.

And now here we are at the web again, finishing this turkey up so I can get to bed. I'm trying to do that early, as I'm sure the lawn guys will be here at the crack of dawn to wake me up and annoy the Yorkie.

Be seeing you.

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Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Now With 100% More Maid!

We finally have a new maid after only a year of being without one, something I never thought would happen at the rate we'd been going. We've got her lined out to come twice a month, deep cleaning the full house once a month, the second time just working on the main side of the house because we figure the guest side and library don't need as much attention as they aren't 'lived in' full time.

I know someone's thinking "What the fuck's this idiot need a maid for?" but please, bear in mind that the wife and I live in a house that's basically waaay too big for just two people, but our packrat nature easily fills it up, which means that a five bedroom home is too much to try and deep clean when the wife won't particularly commit to doing it and I'm not about to take it all on by myself.

She showed at 9:00 this morning, and was here about 6 hours, giving the house a good solid cleaning. The wife and I were both impressed, I hope she sticks around for the long haul.

I checked e-mail and drank a pot of coffee this morning, trying to wake up and get going. The wife split for a meeting and I popped in the iPod and started to prep the three projects I picked up yesterday so that I can work on them later in the week while the wife's out of town. I listened to a new (Cool) Shite On The Tube, a new Dread Media and most of this week's Dead Lantern Splattercast while I worked for most of the afternoon. I took a lunch break somewhere in there and wrote a review to add to the pile for the BSL. I'm trying to rathole a few extra since Skinny's on vacation this week, maybe I can get a few ahead so that I can submit them at my leisure.

I watched the end of the 3rd Pirates Of The Caribbean flick in the late afternoon, TiVo being nice enough to grab it for me last night. I considered re-watching it in its entirety but thought better of it, instead fast forwarding to the point at which the other recording had fucked up and finishing the film from there, still a whopping hour and change of film time. Nice Hat It was even more overlong and convoluted than the 2nd one, and I could again see why people gave it so much shit when it came out, what with all the random plot-threads and Depp chewing scenery in a parody of a parody of Keith Richards. I'm happy to say that I've now seen all three films and will probably never need to re-visit them again. Oh, and Keira Knightley's still a cutie.

The wife and I got fished into dinner with the Mother In Law, Grandmother, the Middle Sister and her kid this evening, and somehow Brian got thrown into that mix as well, presumably since the wife wouldn't have a chance to buy him dinner on Friday night because she may be out of town. I'm growing more jaded to the Brian/weekly dinner situation, but what do you do besides just say "Hey, we're not in the mood to buy you dinner tonight" when he asks what our plans are for the evening?

Dinner came and went without incident and we were soon rid of... er, excuse me, soon able to deposit the Elderly safely back at the MIL's house and head to our own home for the evening. We watched a new Ghost Hunters International and a TiVo'd Girls Next Door before calling it a night.

I'm out.

Be seeing you.

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Tuesday, August 19, 2008

My Day's Fine, The Wife's Was Shit

The wife had her quilting thing to go to today, and then a planned visit to the Mother In Law, to run her by a doctor to check out her thyroid. She was up and out of the house when my alarm went off at 9:00, and I actually ended up sleeping another 45 minutes or so, then got up and checked e-mail before calling the Bossman.

I was pleasantly surprised to catch him on the first try, and made plans to drop by and exchange the finished projects for something new to work on. I dressed and then headed his way, got paid and new material, then hit the bank and deposited the check. He's A Bad Person Doing Good ThingsI hit Target to see what the bonus freebie was that came with the Dexter Season 2 set, because I couldn't find anything online besides '+ free book', which was frustrating. It turned out to be the first novel in paperback, which I already own, so I decided to pass and buy it instead at Best Buy just to save a few bucks.

I made lunch plans with Robbb, then killed an hour or so between Barnes & Noble and Best Buy before going to pick up Robbb. I got a call from the wife, whose plans were steadily unraveling, as she'd had issues with her sewing machine and had given up on the quilting thing for the day. I tried to get her to go and eat with us, but she decided to pass, as she had to meet her Mother pretty soon anyway. I hoped her day would get better, then headed out to get Robbb. He'd gotten a call from his Brother at the last minute, and asked if I'd mind eating in Odessa with him. I was game, so we headed over there and picked him up, then ate and visited for awhile before dropping his Brother off at work and heading back home.

I'd been home a short time when the wife arrived, the rest of her afternoon having turned to shit as they'd been late to the Doctor's office because they had trouble locating the building, and this Doctor refuses to see anyone who is 15 minutes late. Ain't that some shit? Like anyone has ever gone to a Doctor's office and just blew right in in a timely manner instead of sitting in the waiting room for 20 minutes or more. The wife was apparently feeling the stress of the day, as she got a little shitty with them when she saw the Doc herself about to leave the office to deliver half of a fresh mango to another Doctor in the same building, saying "Well maybe if you weren't so worried about delivering that damned mango right now you could get us in rather than fretting about your office policy." I miss all the good stuff, like my sweet wife talking shit to medical professionals.

Once we got caught up on our respective days, we chilled on the couch and both fell asleep for awhile, then I got out and brought her some supper, since she'd had such a frustrating day and accomplished NOTHING that she'd had planned. Cellar Dwellers We watched something I'd picked up a few weeks back, Dead Pit, a flick by director Brett Leonard, who has also directed stuff like Virtuosity, The Lawnmower Man, and more recently the gross creepiness that was Feed.

The flick is actually pretty engrossing for being a fairly obscure, late 80's horror flick about zombies. The camerawork combined with the female lead scampering around an asylum in a white panties and half-shirt combo for a good deal of the film keeps the interest when the plotting may stumble here and there. It's worth a rental.

And now here we are once again, doing the blogging while the wife hits the bed for the night.

I'm out.

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Monday, August 18, 2008

Croc, Workday, Podcasts And Bastards

Last night the wife and I watched Rogue, the new flick from Greg Mclean, the director of Wolf Creek. It's Like Jaws On An Outback...It's about a tour boat full of tourists attacked and trapped by a ginormous croc in the Australian Outback, and it rocked. I was really impressed with the cinematography and the fact that the film managed to actually make me quite tense as they struggle to escape the croc. Great stuff.

I got up this morning and delivered a bulk mailing that I'd helped the wife finish last night, dropping it off at the Museum so that she could make an appointment that she had at 10:30.

I picked up a burrito for breakfast and headed home, ate and checked e-mail before getting started on the last of the graphs, as I wanted to finish the two projects I've been working on today. I listened to last week's (Cool) Shite On The Tube while I worked, then took a break around 1:00 to rest my eyes.

I wrote a review for Rogue and submitted it to the site, then paused to show the potential maid around the house. The wife had called and said she'd be dropping by, so I answered the door and hoped for the best. She seemed okay with the planned twice a month schedule, but had no ready answer as to what she wanted to be paid. Rather than give her a quote of my own, I suggested that she consider the size of the house and the frequency of visits, then contact the wife with a quote when she had the chance. I'm crossing my fingers that we'll soon have a maid again, trying to keep up with this big-ass house has been something of a pain in the ass for the past YEAR, I'd like to have someone coming in to do the major stuff once again while we keep up with dishes and laundry ourselves.

The wife got home as I was working on the second project, listening to the latest Night Of The Living Podcast, so I helped her unload and put away groceries. We caught up on our respective days, then she headed to the bedroom to return a few calls and I finished up my work while listening to the latest SModcast.

called around 5:00, and we made plans to get together and watch a flick this evening, as he'd expressed interest in watching Inglorious Bastards. I headed to Odessa shortly thereafter and we chilled out and watched the movie, he dug it pretty well, and then we got a bite to eat and watched the Castellari/Tarantino feature on the first disc, which was interesting and fun to have someone else around to mock Tarantino with.

I headed home around 10:00, chatted it up with the near-sleeping wife, and then headed to the office to knock this out quickly and go to bed.

Be seeing you.

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Sunday, August 17, 2008

Cinematic Sunday Fifty

Since I find myself on the web at a weird hour of the day (late afternoon/early evening) instead of the usual late-night session, I figure I should try to get an early jump on today's post.

The wife and I were up late again last night, watching some more of the 70's drive-in stuff, two films this time around. Rise And Shine Fucko! The first one was called Best Friends, which was about two guys (one of whom was played by Richard Hatch of Battlestar Galactica), recently released from the military and taking that typical mid-seventies drive across country in an RV. The only problem is that Hatch's buddy doesn't want to let go of their childhood friendship and get a job, he wants to go bumming around with his buddy and dump the chicks. I found his constant 'remember when?' stories to be a little on the homo-erotic side, especially when he kept referring to his friend's fiance as 'just some girl' over and over again. Weird stuff, though it never took the decidedly gay slant I expected it to, the friend turns out to just be nuts. Bah.

The second film was called The Sister In Law, and was about two brothers, one of whom is leaving his wife for his mistress, and then younger bro comes home, nails his wife, and then starts banging the mistress too, all of which leads to a violent conclusion that's nowhere near as interesting as a description of it in print might imply. Nice boobs throughout, though.

We slept late after our cornball double feature, and then I got up and checked e-mail while the wife started some laundry and did a few other household chores. I picked us up some lunch at a drive-thru that took forever, then I got a little work done on the graphs for an hour while the wife did some other cleaning.

She caught a nap and I decided to get a jump on the review stuff for Pop Syndicate, so I watched a movie called Dungeon Girl, wincing immediately as I saw the director was Ulli Lommel, a name I've never heard associated with a good film, ever. He's usually decried in much the same manner as Uwe Boll, the worst two things Germany's been responsible for since, well...y'know, all that shit in the 40's. The film was a lot of camera wankery, bad editing trying to pass for stylish, and the story of a girl held captive for five years just made boring by the deadpan narration that tells us what's happening instead of letting the actors really do anything. It was like watching an audiobook.

I hopped online to do a quick review and submit it while the wounds were still fresh on my psyche, then started chipping away at the blog just to get it finished sooner than later.

Trailers for your viewing pleasure this evening would include:

First up, a British film I've heard a lot of buzz around, which is evidently getting a DVD release in the UK later this month. That film is called The Zombie Diaries, directed by Michael Bartlett and Kevin Gates, which looks pretty interesting based on this trailer. I also noticed a lot of naysayers on the IMDB talking shit about the flick, but IMDB also tends to be riddled with any asshole with a PC espousing whatever dumbass opinions that pop into their heads, so I'm taking that with a grain of salt.

Next up we find Eden Lake, which is another British film, this one directed by James Watkins. It sees a couple taking a holiday in the forest and being set upon by underage hooligans. It looks a lot like High Tension had a baby with Them (Ils) as far as survivalist horror goes, but I'd still definitely give this one a look.

Finally, we have a trailer for another television show, since I mentioned Dexter's return last week, I figured I should give HBO their due. Alan Ball has created a new series for them (the books that it's based on I'm aware of, but can't be bothered to dig around for titles of right now, forgive me), and I think that True Blood looks pretty interesting, it's nice to see something supernatural on a network not hamstrung by the censors and Anna Paquin seems convincing in the 'gee shucks' small town girl role.

I'm out kids.

Be seeing you.

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